Pessimism ALERT!
I sometimes find it difficult not to become bogged down with my own feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy. The moment I began writing LitD, I said to myself, "This is for me, and if nothing comes of it, well, that's okay too. It will be a great journey." That is still true, but now that I've completed my first draft and am very slowly crawling through a meticulous edit of my manuscript, I sometimes feel discouraged.
Writing LitD has been a rather manic experience. There are times when I have the utmost confidence in what I write and other times where I can't help but second guess myself. There are times when I am confident there is a market for my novel and other times when I doubt the market can hold any more dystopian YA fiction. I don't want my novel to be just another book with fangs (like what happened after the Twilight craze).
After reading a very expressive post from the Crowe's Nest, I think I've come to a conclusion about part of what causes my mania. I knew I was doing it, but I didn't fully acknowledge it.
I compare myself too much to other successful writers. Fact: I sit with copies of my well-loved novels next to me when I write. They are a constant reminder of what I am not. They are a constant reminder of what I long to become, of what I will become.
Long term goals:
A.) To become a successful writer.
B.) To become published.
Short term goal:
A.) To get through the second draft.
So what I am currently doing to achieve my goals?
I'm working to put together a panel of students who will read my manuscript and offer me feedback. It will be a wonderful (albeit scary) experience to hear from my target audience. Thank you, already, for those of you who have volunteered.
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