Thursday, February 28, 2013

Goals

Pessimism ALERT!
I sometimes find it difficult not to become bogged down with my own feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy. The moment I began writing LitD, I said to myself, "This is for me, and if nothing comes of it, well, that's okay too.  It will be a great journey."  That is still true, but now that I've completed my first draft and am very slowly crawling through a meticulous edit of my manuscript, I sometimes feel discouraged.

Writing LitD has been a rather manic experience.  There are times when I have the utmost confidence in what I write and other times where I can't help but second guess myself.  There are times when I am confident there is a market for my novel and other times when I doubt the market can hold any more dystopian YA fiction.  I don't want my novel to be just another book with fangs (like what happened after the Twilight craze).

After reading a very expressive post from the Crowe's Nest, I think I've come to a conclusion about part of what causes my mania.  I knew I was doing it, but I didn't fully acknowledge it.

I compare myself too much to other successful writers.  Fact:  I sit with copies of my well-loved novels next to me when I write.  They are a constant reminder of what I am not.  They are a constant reminder of what I long to become, of what I will become.

Long term goals:
A.) To become a successful writer.
B.) To become published.

Short term goal:
A.) To get through the second draft.

So what I am currently doing to achieve my goals?
I'm working to put together a panel of students who will read my manuscript and offer me feedback.  It will be a wonderful (albeit scary) experience to hear from my target audience.  Thank you, already, for those of you who have volunteered.